Dearest Humans of the Masculine Persuasion,

It is quite clear that when many "men" go out to a club they have one mission on their minds: to get some. I can appreciate your ambition, and I can also appreciate the risk you take when putting yourself and your dignity on the line as you approach various women with your less than romantic intentions. I can openly say that I'm so glad that it's typically you and not me that has to put himself out there like that and risk rejection. That being said, allow me to offer some advice.

Last night I was celebrating a friend's birthday by bar hopping with a group of friends. During one point in the night I was walking through the crowd looking for a friend. When I found her she was walking towards me with a man in tow. With a look and a whisper, she quickly begged for me to come with them. Apparently this poor guy asked her to dance, and instead of declining she agreed, but looked to me to help her get out of it. Being the nice gal that I am, I followed them to the dance floor and began busting whatever moves I felt needed busting. Before even getting a chance to "walk it out," First Guy's friend came from nowhere and began dancing with me. His grip was so tight and he held me so close that I couldn't pull away from him. Not only that but his entire body was pressed up against mine, and I do mean his entire body--got me? ***gags*** Leading a girl as you dance is one thing, but suffocating her is another.

I had to think quickly so I reached my arm around to my cell phone that I had slipped in my back pocket. I pushed a button as it was in my pocket so that when I pulled it out the keypad would be lit. I pulled it up to my face and began reading a text. He had pulled me so close to him that I had to hold the phone behind his head so that I could see it. I had actually already read the text about an hour before. I managed to pull myself away from my dance partner, so that I could show my friend. I said, "Look! "C" just texted me. She wants us to meet her!"

And not skipping a beat, my friend began reading the text I had already shown her an hour before and she pretended it was a new one. We apologized to the guys and thanked them for the dance and got the hell out of there.

My advice here is to not be so aggressive! It didn't matter what that guy looked like or how smooth he thought he was, he ruined it the second he grabbed me, pushed himself on me and wouldn't let me go--which was actually the very first second we met.

When meeting a girl at a club:

1) Be yourself.

2) Be confident.

3) Give her space.

4) Think of it as just having a conversation with a possible new friend. If you put any more pressure on the first conversation, you'll blow it. You'll be too agressive, which will turn her off--or you'll be too nervous.

5) If a girl pulls out her cell phone from her back pocket and claims she received a text that says she must immediately meet her friend somewhere at that very second, you did something wrong.


Thank you!